All My Favourite Books

Tuesday 28 April 2020 at April 28, 2020

Weeks ago, I was still spacing out in the office, imaging what it would be like when Singapore finally enforces work from home measures. Today, it has already been 3 weeks since I started working from home. During this period of time, you may choose to see, focus, and even magnify the negative sides of this isolation measure. Despite being an introvert living in a first world country with many privileges (lol), what I dislike most is that I won't be able to see my boyfriend, and even my sister for two whole months. I dislike not being able to go to the gym, I was supposed to visit Switzerland next week, and I don't like not having the freedom to go out whenever and wherever I want. But no matter what you dislike about the current situation, what you choose to focus on creates your experience. Therefore, I choose to see and celebrate the many positives of this circuit breaker.



I think that one of the many perks of this circuit breaker is the sudden increase in free time which is getting more and more people to start engaging in activities and hobbies they didn't had the time for. One popular activity is reading. Therefore, for starters who are trying to get themselves to read more books during this period of time, I thought I would share with you some of my all-time favourite books to get you rolling.


Before I wanted to learn about spirituality, I didn't like self-help books and preferred fiction or 'storybooks' instead. I have a wild imagination (thus an overthinking mind haha) and reading storybooks really allowed me to put that wild imagination to good use as I would imagine how the characters look like. So for those of you who prefer storybooks as well, here are a couple of my all-time favourite!

How To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee

Even if you're not a bookworm, you'd most likely have heard of this book. In fact, that was the sole reason why I even picked this book up in the first place. How To Kill A Mockingbird is a story about a black man who is being accused of raping a white girl. The story is being told in the perspective of Jean, who is the child of the lawyer appointed to defend the black man. Occurring in the early 1930s, racial inequality between the blacks and whites, mainly discrimination of black people was still a huge issue back then. Therefore, the main story tells about how Jean's father chose to not let the race of the black man cloud and influence his judgement despite being mocked and pressured by the white people of the town. At this age, we're often easily influenced and I believe some of us even find the need to constantly please others by blindly agreeing with the majority. This book to me, perfectly shows that a popular opinion doesn't always mean that it's the right one and my favourite quote from this book is:

"The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience." - How To Kill A Mockingbird, Harper Lee.

As this is a very old book, be prepared to come across tons of olden days slangs and phrases. Because of that, I find that while reading this book, I had to Google the meaning of multiple phrases and words, but instead of viewing it as troublesome, I actually enjoyed learning some of the olden days slangs!

Kakfa On The Store by Murakami

I have finished reading a small number of Murakami's works, but Kakfa On The Store remains one of my favourites. For a non-bookworm, this book was rather intimidating for me to begin because it is so thick. But surprisingly I managed to finish it rather quickly as it was so intriguing, I just never wanted to put the book down after I pick it up. What I love about Murakami's books is how he made sure to describe every scene in details which kept my imaginative mind busy. Although I finished his book years ago, I still remembered how the library and the serene forest looked in my mind. Another thing I love about his works is how mysterious and mystical the plot is which constantly puts me in a confused state, but once you got it, the sense of satisfaction is worth it. The endings of his books are always abrupt which may bother those of you who have closure issues - like myself, and Sheldon Cooper - but I've learnt that it simply make things more interesting as I'd always go online and read up on different people's ending and analysis of the book.

Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom


I've mentioned this book so many times, I have actually thought of excluding it in today's post. But when I think about how much I love this book, I decided that it is worth mentioning again, just in case you still have not read it. Tuesdays with Morrie is another one of those books that you might have heard of despite not being into books. If you have not, then maybe you've heard of The Five People You Meet In Heaven which is another one of Mitch Albom's works. I believe the first Mitch Album book I read was The Five People You Meet In Heaven, which was really good, but nothing from Mitch Album tops Tuesdays with Morrie for me. This is a book that I finished in 2 days because it was so good I even read it on public transport (I have motion sickness). Tuesdays with Morrie is based on a true story involving the author Mitch Album and his professor Morrie. After being diagnosed with ALS, Morrie is slowly approaching death. During his final months, Mitch meets up with Morrie at his place every Tuesday as Morrie shares his perspective of the various key components of life now that death is right by his doorstep. This book not only conveys the true messages and lessons of our time here on Earth, but it is also heartbreaking and who doesn't love a book that can make you emotional...

“Love always win.” - Morrie Schwartz
“Don’t cling to things because everything is impermanent.” - Morrie Schwartz

As I've mentioned, I never used to like self-help books, but that was before knowing that 'self-help' is such a wide genre. My boyfriend reads self-help books as well and they are so incredibly different from what I read. Therefore, instead of calling them self-help books, I like to call them spiritual books instead. For those of you who aren't familiar with the terms 'spiritual' or 'spirituality', I get it. It sounds completely like some witchy-woo, psychic, connecting with "the other side" thing. But it's not. Spiritual books are books that remind us of our capabilities, our source, our power (not the witchy-woo kind), our purpose on Earth as spiritual beings. That being said, you don't have to be aware of what spirituality is, or the law of attraction, or how the universe works to 'be spiritual' or to be a 'miracle worker' or to 'vibe high'. There are people out there already performing miracles even without knowing all these terms. I however, need to be reminded of who I really am constantly, and so reading spiritual books is a great way for me to stay centred and awaken.

A Return To Love by Marianne Williamson

This is my all-time favourite spiritual book. When I first started this book, I felt a little uncomfortable because of it kept mentioning 'God', and 'the Holy Spirit', and 'Christ'. Despite growing up in a Christian family, trying my best to pray every night, being forced to go to church every Sunday and whatnot, I've never felt a connection with God. In fact, I've unknowingly developed a resistance towards these words along with Christianity. Nonetheless, I continued reading which made me realise that I had such a huge misconception about God. I've always thought that God is exclusive to Christianity and more importantly I've always thought that God is a judgemental old man who watches your every move and on judgement day when you pass, he'll send you to suffer for the rest of eternal as long as you did not believe in him or has done something sinful and didn't repent during your time on Earth.


A Return To Love perfectly highlights and explains why some of us have these misconceptions and resistance and it also tells me the truth, which is love.



What I love about A Return To Love is how it not only transformed my perspective and resolved my resistance towards God, but it is also a great book that reflects all the teachings of A Course In Miracles. I read this book when I was in a slightly darker place in my life. I had a lot of insecurities which made me feel like I'm not enough, less than others, unworthy, etc. But this book made me see that I am and have always been good enough and the amount of comfort it gave me during that period of time was immeasurable.

A Course In Miracles Made Easy by Alan Cohen


A Course In Miracles Made Easy is a book I have recently finished and it is definitely my second favourite spiritual book as of right now. This is another book that perfectly conveys all the lessons and teachings of A Course In Miracles. I own A Course In Miracles and even though I've had it for months, I just don't think that I'm ready for it. Thus, to help me ease into the course better, I thought I would read A Course In Miracles Made Easy to at least get a gist of what the book is about. Although both A Return To Love and A Course In Miracles Made Easy are both books that refer to A Course In Miracles, I would say that they are still two different books.



A Return to Love is more of an afterthought and reflection, while A Course In Miracles Made Easy is... Well, the course itself, made easy. What I love about this book is that it's easy. It's super easy to read and I love that it contains real life experiences of how the author and other people implement the course's lessons in life because sometimes, I feel like I'm struggling. Times when I lose my temper over small things, or times when I become petty or act like I don't have enough. Even though I try not to beat myself up about it, sometimes it's still disappointing to see how slow I'm progressing. In this book, I find that the author made a huge effort to highlight such moments and it made me learn how to see these moments with a new pair of eyes.

"When you cultivate activities that truly bring you joy, you establish yourself in the domain of the soul." - A Course In Miracles Made Easy, Alan Cohen.

The Power Of Now by Eckhart Tolle


The Power Of Now is another really popular book that you might have heard of even if you're not interested in the topic of spirituality. After developing a higher sense of self-awareness, I notice that I would always, always, find myself in either the past or the future. When I'm showering, I've almost never once thought about how the soap foams and how smooth it feels on my skin because I'm always reliving the highlights of my day, even if they're bad ones. When I'm in bed, realistically speaking, nowadays I'd always be thinking about my breakfast the next day, but there were also days where I would think about how much my skin sucks and how come I don't have clear skin, blah blah blah and these thoughts often caused me to lose sleep, feel anxious and depressed. Although there are numerous ways to practice spirituality, being in the present moment is by far the easiest method and this book basically tells you why.

You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay



Most of the self-help books mentioned above have been very comforting for me as with each book, I experience deeper inner peace. Being in alignment with what is, also really helped me during this circuit breaker and so I hope that if you're having a tough time coping with all the changes in this period, reading these books will provide you some comfort too.

Currently, I'm trying to finish the book Conversations With God by Neal Donald Walsch. Even though I have way more free time than before, it's still sometimes difficult for me to find the motivation to pick up a book and read because I'm always wanting to do something else. Therefore, for this book, I've started listening to the audio book instead which has been really helpful for me to fully utilize my time as I'm able to cook whilst listening, paint whilst listening, do my nails whilst listening, work whilst listening, etc. Thus if you're like me and you're always wanting to do something else instead of sitting there with a book, definitely try out audio books!

Labels: lifestyle, stress relief

Korean Hyaluronic Acid Serums & Ampoules Collective Review

Sunday 16 February 2020 at February 16, 2020

The Ordinary Hyaluronic Acid 2% + B5 serum has been a staple in my skincare routine for the past 9 months but while I certainly don't mind keeping it in my routine, as a skincare content creator,  I've always felt that I ought to give the other hyaluronic acid serums in the market a chance. Therefore, when the opportunity came to work with Joohky, I decided to pick out 6 Korean hyaluronic acid products to try. With the data I've gathered from my experiences with the products, today I will be sharing with you my thoughts on the 6 Korean hyaluronic acid serums and ampoules.


Before I begin the review, I would like to give my sincerest gratitude to Joohky for their interest to partner up with me for this blog post. If you haven't heard of Joohky, they are an online Korean beauty store based in South Korea which ships worldwide. I love that they offer K-beauty products from both mainstream and non-mainstream Korean brands such as Cosrx, PURITO, I'm From, Huxley, A'PIEU, Mamonde, Banila Co., etc, so people all around the world will be able to enjoy amazing and affordable K-beauty products. If you're a Korean beauty lover like I am but you don't have these brands in your country, make sure to check out Joohky! 


Beginning with something simple, I chose the Elizavecca Hyaluronic Acid 100% ($25). Elizavecca is a brand that I wasn't familiar with, but a simple Google search will tell you that their hyaluronic acid serums are one of their best-sellers. As someone with sensitive skin, I tend to lean towards products with shorter ingredient lists these days and so I was attracted to this product because it contains only one ingredient: Sodium Hyaluronate.

Thanks to the simplicity of this product, I love that I don't have to worry about this irritating, sensitising or clogging my skin since the only thing sodium hyaluronate is capable of doing is attract and hold moisture in my skin. No matter what routine you have going on for you at the moment, as long as you think that your routine isn't hydrating enough, I think this is a product that you can easily add into your routine to boost the hydration levels in your skin without the use of heavy products. It has a thick gooey consistency which fits in really nicely in my moisturising routine.





Although I think this product will work for everyone, Since the risk of irritation from hyaluronic acid itself is low, I think it will be most suitable for those who either has easily irritated or highly sensitive skin, or those who are just starting out to build a simple skincare routine. So far, I have been loving this addition in my routine. Even though it doesn't come with any other skincare benefits other than hydrating, for the price, it is definitely a product that I will recommend.

Pros: Non-irritating, non-clogging, non-sensitising.
Cons: Does not provide any other skincare benefits other than hydration.

The other best-selling hyaluronic acid serum from Elizavecca is the Hell Pore Control Hyalyuronic Acid 97% ($17). Instead of Sodium hyaluronate, this serum contains 97% of Hyaluronic acid, followed by an unknown concentration of Niacinamide, which an ingredient known to help minimize the appearance of enlarged pores, acne, dullness and dryness. This serum also contains 2 soothing and healing ingredients and they are Adenosine and Allantoin.

Ingredients: Hyaluronic acid, niacinamide, propylene glycol, 1,2-hexanediol, PEG-60 hydrogenated caster oil, adenosine, allantoin, carbomer, arginine, fragrance.

Due to the high concentration of hyaluronic acid and existence of niacinamide, I think this is a great option for people who are looking for a serum that can not only hydrate their skin, but to also help with very mild acne and redness. Even though it contains fragrance, it is the very last ingredient and so I think we can safely assume that it will be non-toxic for the skin. If you have acne-prone skin which cannot tolerate oils in your skincare, do take note that this serum is also not 100% oil-free. Personally, I have sensitized, pretty easily irritated acne-prone skin and so I'd prefer something else. Nevertheless, I still think that this is a good and affordable hyaluronic acid serum to consider if acne and skin-sensitivity are not something that you are experiencing.

Pros: Hydrating, soothing, and can help with mild acne and redness.
Cons: It is neither oil-free nor fragrance-free.

Moving on, I've chose the Tia'm Hyaluronic Water Plumping Serum ($15). Even though I have near heard of this brand prior of this product, I was pleasantly surprised with its ingredients. Containing six different types of Hyaluronic acid, this serum also contains a good amount of other types of moisture-attracting and retaining humectants like Butlyene glycol and Glycerin. In addition, this also contains soothing and healing ingredients like Panthenol aka Vitamin B5, and Allantoin. The other highly concentrated ingredient in this that caught my attention is the Nelumbium Speciosum Flower Extract which is said to have healing, soothing and moisturising properties.

Ingredients: Water, Butylene Glycol, Glycerin, Nelumbium Speciosum Flower Extract, Betaine, 1,2-Hexandiol, Panthenol, HA-6(Hyaluronic Acid, Hydrolyzed Sodium Hyaluronate, Hydrolyzed Hyaluronic Acid, Sodium Hyaluronate(Macromolecule & Micromolecule),Sodium Hyaluronate Crosspolymer)1,500ppm, Polysorbate 60, Caprylic/Capric Triglyceride, Allantoin, Hydroxyethyl Acrylate/Sodium Acryloyldimethyl Taurate Copolymer, Hydroxyethylcellulose, Xanthan gum, Citrus Aurantium Bergamia (Bergamot) Fruit Oil, Citrus Limon (Lemon) Peel Oil

One again, I think this serum is a considerable option if you're looking for something with soothing and healing benefits, and if you don't mind having essential oils as the last two ingredients. Since it contains less than 1% of Hyaluronic acid, it might not be the most hydrating option in today's list and therefore, it is not a terrible product but it is definitely not one that will repurchase or recommend.

Pros: Oil-free and has soothing and healing benefits.
Cons: Not concentrated with Hyaluronic acid and contains two essential oils.

The next product is the Real Comforting Hyaluronic Acid Moisturizing Ampoule from Nature Republic. This ampoule contains three different forms of Hyaluronic acid - Sodium Hyaluronate, Hydriolyzed Hyaluronic Acid, and Hydroxypropyltrimonium Hyaluronate. Additionally, this ampoule is also concentrated with many other types of humectants. Since the ingredient list for this ampoule is not as short as compared to the other products in this list, I was hoping to find some calming and soothing ingredients, but surprisingly there are none.

Ingredients: Water, Propanediol, Glycerin, Butylene Glycol, Pentylene Glycol, Chondrus Crispus Extract, Saccharum Officinarum (Sugarcane) Extract, Sodium Hyaluronate, Citrus Aurantium Bergamia (Bergamot) Fruit Oil, Eucalyptus Globulus Leaf Oil, Hydrolyzed Hyaluronic Acid, 1.2-Hexanediol, Polyglycerin-3, C12-14 Pareth-12, Tromethamine, Ethylhexyglicerin, Acrylates/C10-30 Alkyl Acrylate Crosspolymer, Hydroxypropyltrimonium Hyaluronate, Carbomer, Xanthan Gum, Disodium Edta

While I was doing my research on this product, I found out that many of its promotional content listed this as an ampoule for sensitive skin. Unfortunately, I think otherwise, as the strong scent of the two essential oils in this product can be smelled the moment I remove the cap. Although this product has one of the nicest packaging, and it is also one of the most expensive product, it is not an ampoule that I will use or recommend. Especially when I have so many more better options to choose from!

Pros: Contains multiple hydrating ingredients.
Cons: Not highly concentrated in Hyaluronic acid, contains essential oils and doesn't provide any other skincare benefits.

Purito is one of my favourite non-mainstream Korean skincare brand and so it only makes sense for me to try their Pure Hyaluronic Acid 90 serum ($15).
I think the ingredients are quite comparable to The Ordinary's Hyaluronic Acid 2% + B5 serum since its key ingredients are both Hyaluronic Acid and Vitamin B5. However, because it didn't state the percentage of the Hyaluronic Acid and Sodium Hyaluronate is the 7th ingredient, I would say that you'll definitely get more from The Ordinary's Hyaluronic Acid 2% + B5 serum. Nevertheless, I have been enjoying this product due to its simple and minimal ingredient list and I think it is a good option to consider if you are unable to purchase The Ordinary from where you are living.

Pros: Provides hydrating and soothing benefits, oil-free and fragrance-free.
Cons: Concentration of Hyaluronic acid is unknown.

I am honestly so surprised at how great most of the products turned out! Even though reviewing products is a part of my job, I really hate it when I end up with a bad product that will only take up space in my tiny room and so I love that I am able to use and make the most out of these products! As you saw from the ingredient lists, I love that none of the products contain drying alcohol, and a huge majority of them are oil-free, making them suitable for people with acne-prone skin like mine. Essential oils are noted to be famous is Korean beauty. I have people telling me that they refuse to try Korean beauty because they are 'pretty sure' it will be drowned in fragrances! Therefore, I am happy to see that changes are starting to take place as consumers and companies are finally starhttps://youtu.be/36qKLUDuMuUting to become aware of the harmful effects of essential oils on our skin!



Once again, the discovery of these amazing hyaluronic acid products will not be possible without the kind generosity I received from Joohky, and so make sure to check them out if you're interested in any of the products I've mentioned, or any other Korean beauty products!

WATCH THE VIDEO REVIEW HERE.

Labels: beauty, face, korean, review, skincare

Skincare Talk: Long-lasting Non-comedogenic foundation routine for acne prone skin and acne scars

Friday 24 January 2020 at January 24, 2020

There are two main points about this foundation routine, making it very suitable for people with oily, acne-prone skin type, and also for people with acne scars to conceal.

1.  The products used in this routine are mostly non-comedogenic which will minimize the risk of them clogging your skin. They are also safe for the skin which will prevent inflammation, and sensitising of the skin.
2. The products have high coverage and long-lasting properties.

So without further ado, let's get right into it!




I first tried the Estee Lauder Double Wear Stay In Place Makeup in 2016 when it was kindly sent to me for free. Even though I loved it since day one, it didn't stop me from wanting to explore the countless of other highly-raved liquid foundations in the market. After many years of exploration and spending money on disappointing foundations, I finally concluded that this is indeed the best liquid foundation in the market.

The Estee Lauder Double Wear Stay In Place Makeup liquid foundation comes in a wide range of shades, so finding one that suits your skin tone will definitely not be an issue. I'm using the shade 2C3 Fresco which falls under light to medium with cool undertones. C stands for 'cool', N stands for 'neutral' and W stands for 'warm'. Having oily skin, I hate the feeling of thick, heavy foundation on my skin. Thankfully, this foundation has high coverage. With a damp beauty blender, I never go above one layer of foundation since that alone is sufficient to conceal most of my blemishes. For a fuller coverage, feel free to experiment with different application methods like a dry beauty blender, or your fingers, or a foundation brush.

Ingredients: Water\Aqua\Eau , Cyclopentasiloxane , Trimethylsiloxysilicate , Peg/Ppg-18/18 Dimethicone , Butylene Glycol , Tribehenin , Polyglyceryl-3 Diisostearate , Magnesium Sulfate , Tocopheryl Acetate , Polymethylsilsesquioxane , Methicone , Laureth-7 , Xanthan Gum , Alumina , Sodium Dehydroacetate , Disteardimonium Hectorite , Cellulose Gum , Propylene Carbonate , Pentaerythrityl Tetra-Di-T-Butyl Hydroxyhydrocinnamate , Phenoxyethanol , [+/- Iron Oxides (Ci 77491, Ci 77492, Ci 77499) , Mica , Titanium Dioxide (Ci 77891)]
- quoted from Estee Lauder's official website. 

Due to its oil-control formulation, this foundation is able to keep my skin looking matte and non-blotchy throughout the day. In addition, this foundation is also alcohol-free, oil-free, and fragrance-free, making it safe, non-comedogenic and non-clogging for acne-prone and sensitive/sensitised skin.

Once this foundation sets, you can trust it to stay on your face for the entire day without powdering. At the end of the day, it dissolves and comes off easily with my Bioderma Sensibio Micellar Solution. Once the cotton pad comes out clean, I will "double cleanse" with my facial cleanser to ensure that no foundation goes into bed with me.

If your acne marks are light, you may stop at this very first step. If not, proceed with step two to conceal the remaining of the acne marks.




The Benefit Boi-ing Industrial Strength Concealer provides full coverage for even the darkest spots. But unlike the foundation, this concealer only comes in 3 limiting shades. I'm using shade No.2 which is the light-medium. It's not the perfect match, but unless you were to look closely, the shade difference is not obvious. To get the maximum coverage from this concealer, I find that it is best applied using my finger. As long as you ensure to watch your hands before dipping your finger in the pan, using your finger will be a lot more hygienic and effective than a brush.

Ingredients: Caprylic/Capric Triglyceride, Phenyl Trimethicone, Isopropyl Palmitate, Euphorbia Cerifera (Candelilla) Wax, Talc, Paraffinum Liquidum (Mineral Oil), Silica, Kaolin, Cera Microcristallina (Microcrystalline Wax), Nylon-12, Tocopheryl Acetate, Phenoxyethanol, Lecithin, Benzyl Alcohol, Tocopherol, Bht. [+/-: Ci 19140 (Yellow 5, Yellow 5 Lake), Ci 42090 (Blue 1 Lake), Ci 77007 (Ultramarines), Ci 77163 (Bismuth Oxychloride), Ci 77491, Ci 77492, Ci 77499 (Iron Oxides), Ci 77891 (Titanium Dioxide)]. - quoted from Sephora.

I believe one of the reasons why this concealer is able to provide such long-lasting full coverage is its thick and waxy consistency. Although this enables me to easily obtain a full coverage without using multiple layers of concealer, the heavy waxes found in the concealer can be clogging for the skin. Not to mention that this concealer also contains a mineral oil. Nevertheless, I believe that clogging can be easily avoided as long as you don't overuse this concealer. Don't bother using this concealer on areas where you won't require it, such as your under eyes. The thickness of this concealer will definitely crease around the eye area. This is also the reason why I prefer to apply my foundation first before my concealer, so I don't use it unnecessarily.

The first two products do not require setting powders, but on days where I'll be wearing my foundation for the entire day, I like to do an additional step for my own peace of mind.




The Jane Iredale PurePressed Based Mineral Powder is highly raved by Olena Beley, a skin coach who I used to follow because it's non-comedogenic, safe for the skin and provides high coverage. For more information on this powder, you may check out her numerous content for it (1 | 2 | 3).

Ingredients: Mica, Boron Nitride, Dimethicone, Stearic Acid, Plankton Extract, Algae Extract, Pinus Strobus (Pine) Bark Extract, Punica Granatum (Pomegranate) Extract. [+/- (May Contain: Iron Oxides (CI 77489, CI 77491, CI 77492, CI 77499), Ultramarines (CI 77007), Chromium Oxide Greens (CI 77288)] - quote from Jane Iredale's official website. 

Through her recommendation, I decided to try it out for myself. I'm using the shade Natural which is again, slightly dark for me, but the difference is not obvious. After experimenting with different application methods, I concluded that I didn't like using this on my entire face. It could be the humidity in Singapore, or my oily skin, but I find that it always gets cakey and blotchy, even when I apply lightly with a brush. In spite of that, I wasn't ready to give up on this product. It was expensive. So I started using this to very lightly set and also to provide additional coverage to the areas needed, such as the really, really dark spots, or around my nose. By doing so, I avoid caking my face, and I love that it helps my foundation last even longer.


If you are keen to try this foundation routine for yourself, I would love to know how the products worked for you! Also, if you have any other questions regarding the products, feel free to drop me an e-mail or a DM, and I will try my best to answer them. If you'd like to see the products in action, you may click here to watch my Youtube video on this foundation routine.
Before I sign-off, I want to highlight that even if the products, be it skincare or makeup, are non-comedogenic and oil-free, overusing any heavy products like moisturisers or liquid foundations, can still cause clogging, and so it's important to pay attention to how much you're actually using. Personal hygiene plays a role in breakouts too. Therefore, do ensure that your applicators are well-cleaned and that you remove all your makeup before going to bed every night.

Labels: face, looks, make-up, review, skincare, skincare talk, tutorials

Goodbye 2019, Hello 2020!

Wednesday 18 December 2019 at December 18, 2019

I haven't posted an entry here in awhile as I've been caught up creating content elsewhere (i.e mostly Youtube, and also my painting pad), but as a new year approaches, I wanted to take some time to reflect back on the year 2019. While many memorable events took place during the last 352 days, 2019 was a year of spiritual growth for me.


I recall ending 2018 on an amazing note. I'd booked my flight to Korea which is my favourite country, and I was most looking forward to our second time there as we were also planning to take our pre-wedding photos in Seoul. I've always been a 'if you fail to plan, you plan to fail' kinda girl, but as life always do, things did not go entirely as planned. Two months just before our trip, I got more and more desperate to end the 'struggle' with my skin which ended up in more breakouts, of course. Looking back now it is so clear to me that I was simply out of alignment with reality. My skin wasn't even bad but because I only focused on the breakouts, it made things look worse than they actually were. As the long-awaited trip drew nearer, I got more and more frustrated, angry, and upset with myself. In Korea, my sub-consciousness was constantly insecure, and physically, I was uncomfortable for most parts of my trip because of my sensitized and irritated skin. I was living an overly paranoid life and hated myself for months, until I started actively following Olena from olenabeley.com.

Olena's Youtube video appeared in my Youtube feed back in February 2019. While I started following her solely for the sake of her skincare advises, I was soon more intrigued with her advise to self-love. At that point of time, I was exhausted from all the hate I have for myself, I was so exhausted from all the noise, fear, judgement, and insecurity. But I didn't know how to stop those feelings and thoughts. Heck, I didn't know I could. 'Love yourself' was such a blurry concept to me, but through Olena's Instagram lives and DMs, and the books she recommended, I started having a clearer understanding of self-love and spirituality. If you were to simply say the word 'spirituality' to me a year ago, I would think that it must have something to do with voodoo dolls and witchcraft, and if someone's suddenly 'becoming spiritual', they must have had some sort of enlightenment where a bright light has shone upon them and they either saw God, or some of his angels....... Therefore, I completely understand if some of you still thinks that way, even though it has nothing to do with that, and personally, it wasn't such a dramatic experience.

My journey to becoming more spiritual and at peace with myself is rather slow-paced. Basically, the more I read, the more I learn, and the better I get at my practices... And I read pretty slow. Nevertheless, I believe this pace is most suitable for me at this moment as forcing myself to pick up the books even when I don’t feel like it will only result in an unenjoyable experience. Instead of enjoying my time reading and fully absorbing all the information presented to me, it will only end up making me feel as though 'I must read in order to feel good about myself'. Through this journey, I have learnt many things that have greatly transformed my life in a positive way. It will be too much to list everything down, but I do want to highlight two of them here.

First, I've learnt how to love myself. I went from feeling 'less than others' because of my appearance, my capabilities, my talents, my career, desperate, trying to get out of my 'struggle with acne', scared that I will never have clear skin again or I'd be covered in acne scars, fear that everyone is always judging me based on my skin or is staring at my skin, identifying my skin with 'who I am', hating myself... To loving myself. Through loving myself, I've not only begun loving my skin, but I have also started making better skincare and lifestyle choices out of love instead of fear. Such as avoiding harsh and toxic skincare ingredients, going to bed earlier, eat lesser junk, and spending more time with, and for myself. I start to see that we're all meant to be different. There's room for everyone to be beautiful, to be successful, to have everything we want, and to shine in our own light. There's no need to ever compare, get jealous, or compete.

A tulip doesn’t strive to impress anyone. It doesn’t struggle to be different than a rose. It doesn’t have to. It is different.  And there’s room in the garden for every flower. - Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love. 

Power over others is weakness disguised as strength. - Eckhart Tolle, The Power Of Now.

I stopped putting myself down and being hard on myself which was something I did often but wasn't even aware of, and I am no longer ashamed by how my skin looks, as I've learnt the simple fact that I'm not my skin. Nor am I anything in the outside world.

The most common ego identifications have to do with possessions, the work you do, social status and recognition, knowledge and education, physical appearance, special abilities, relationships, personal and family history, belief systems, and often also political, nationalistic, racial, religious, and other collective identifications. None of these is you. - Michael A Singer, The Untethered Soul.  

Second, I've learnt how to let go. A year ago, if you ask me, I would rather die than admit that I was hurt from the fallout with my friends back in 2017. Back when it just happened, I was advised to 'let it go' by not bringing it up again as doing so would mean that I am acknowledging that they are not worth my time, and this was supposedly a sign of being strong. I believed in that for a very long time until I learnt the true meaning of strength, and the true purpose of letting things go. "Darkness cannot survive in the presence of light."

Darkness is brought into light, and not the other way round. According to the Course, “No one can escape from illusions unless he looks at them, for not looking is the way they are protected.” 

In order to truly let go of something, "first, you must be aware that there is something within you that needs to be released". This is the point where the ego will tell you that admitting and acknowledging you're hurt is a sign of weakness, and how embarrassing would that be, caring for people who doesn't feel the same way about you. But in reality, how many of us are actually strong enough to put our prides down and admit that we are hurt, that we are vulnerable, that things do bother us deeply? I loved and cherished my friends, which was why I got hurt. I felt wronged because I didn't do anything. But now that I understand that we are responsible for everything we experience, I remain at peace knowing that I am not responsible for anyone's behavior or reaction, and they are not responsible for mine either. I felt betrayed because I didn't understand why most of them didn't speak up for me, but now I see that they were fearful and weak (and I'm not saying this in a condescending way, everyone have their fears and weaknesses, of course myself included as I was also too weak to admit I was emotionally affected). It's never easy to let go of a long-term relationship, even if it no longer serves you. But now that 2 years have passed, I can see clearly now that the relationship ended for the better. Through this friendship, I have gained more than I've lost. In fact, I've never lost anything.

Relationships are eternal. The 'separation' is another chapter in the relationship. Often, letting go of the old form of the relationship becomes a lesson in pure love much deeper than any would have learned had the couple stayed together. - Marrianne Williamson, A Return To Love. 

For other highlights of 2019 worth mentioning, in 2019...


We experienced many 'first time's as a couple! Starting with our Korea trip, as I've briefly mentioned earlier on, we took our pre-wedding photoshoot (vlog 1 | 2 | 3) in Korea! What a dream to be able to take my pre-wedding photos in my favourite country. For an introvert, the thought of needing to pose in front of a group of strangers was quite nerve-wrecking. However, I'm really thankful for the team at Wonkyu Studio, and especially our translator Ruolin who took great care of us.


We went to Busan for the first time and did many touristy stuff such as wandering around Haeundae beach, and watching the light show at Gwangalli Bridge. Busan is definitely a city I would love to visit again as the shopping is almost as amazing as Seoul's (majority of my fashion haul is from Busan, but Seoul has The Ordinary so that's that), but there are lesser crowds and tourists which makes the environment more slow-paced and laid back.


In Seoul, we went to Lotte World, wore Korean school uniforms, saw North Korea from afar at the DMZ, took a 2 hours bus ride to attend a concert together at Gwangju, which leads me to the next highlight of 2019 which is... I, or we, met BTS.



I became a fan in 2018 when Fake Love was released, and because they were already crazy popular and famous, I never thought that I would one day have the chance to meet them... But I did... Twice!!  I've published my experiences on this blog, so if you need a recap, the first time is when they were here for the Love Yourself tour (vlog), and the second time is during the SBS Super Concert 2019 (vlog) in Gwangju. It still feels like a dream to be able to watch them perform especially during the concert in Korea. That was the first time the both of us attended a concert together and we also saw many other celebrities like TWICE (who is also one of my favourite girl groups), TXT, etc.

Despite this year's Korea trip being less enjoyable than the previous one back in 2017, the both of us are always happy to add another huge block of precious memory to our memory bank. During almost every trip we take together, there will definitely be times where we'll fight and argue, and also momentarily hate each other. But at the same time, every disagreement is an opportunity for us to not only understand the other party better, but ourselves as well. Through the imperfections in our relationship, we learn how to make it perfect.

For my solo highlights, in 2019...

I hiked up a mountain (it would be 'we', but that's not his first time...). During our Taipei trip, we went hiking at Mt. Qixing. It was rainy, cloudy, windy, and honestly quite scary for a coward like myself. In spite of that, the mountain was actually a pretty easy hike. You might think it's easy for me to say it since I did it, but there were elementary kids hiking the mountain as an excursion so... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ The highlight of this hike wasn't reaching the peak actually since the view wasn't as breathtaking as I was expecting, instead it was my encounter with a wild snake near the peak. I sprinted all the way to the top after, haha!



I went for new fitness classes! As you may know, I've gotten myself a gym membership in 2018 and since then, fitness has become a huge part of my life. While I still enjoy going to my usual gym classes and completing my usual gym routine, it's always good to push yourself to try new workout routines. Towards the end of the year, I joined the ClassPass trial with my friend Joy, and through that we got to try Barry's Bootcamp, spin classes at Ground Zero and Absolute You, rebounding classes and interval classes at one of my favourite studios, BeatX Studio! I had so much fun during all the classes and I'm so happy to be able to do them all whilst spending time with Joy!



I completely changed my views and opinions on skincare. As someone who used to have normal, oily skin, I did not need to pay special attention to my skincare products or routine. Back then, every single product that were sent to me 'worked', which was also defined as, 'as long as it didn't break me out after 2 weeks'. But after experiencing that entire episode with my skin, I decide to not only start taking real care of my skin, but also take more responsibility for the things I say in my reviews by reading up on skincare, being well-prepared before I film, and also reminding myself that my videos are made to help others either to avoid my situation or to help them solve their skin troubles. This change in how I proceed with my reviews have definitely changed my channel's growth and audience, and I am forever thankful for those who trust me, support me, and leave me positive and sweet comments. What we bless in others, we draw to us.



Finally, I started drawing and painting as a mean to start doing what I love again. It has always been clear to me (and I suppose to everyone else as well), that my right brain is much more dominant, and so it doesn't matter what the end results look like because, the highest prize we can receive for creative work is the joy of being creative. It hasn't been long since I've started but it is definitely one of the best decisions I've made for myself. Painting feels very much like meditating to me. It puts me in the present moment, and it quiets my mind, except, it satisfies the needs of my right brain at the same time.


Even though my mental health wasn't the best during the first half of 2019, I am grateful for everything that has happened. Through the downs I've faced, I have learnt to see the bigger picture. Everything that causes a disturbance in me is an opportunity for spiritual growth, and with every downs I get through, I become more at peace. Therefore in 2020, I strive to focus more deeply on myself and to continue growing spiritually. As I continue surrendering my life to God's plan, I believe everything will fall in place... And hopefully I will get to see BTS again.

Labels: lifestyle